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Thank you, Congress, for Putting Child Safety First!

April 26, 2018 by

Important update!

Congress passed House Conc. Resolution 72 on September 24th, late into the evening.

This was a bipartisan effort with tireless support from child advocates, lawyers and legislators from across the country. This was a tremendous first step toward improving safety, mental health and family stability for children!

Watch this video courtesy of C-SPAN to hear what Representatives from both the Republican and Democratic parties have to say about this new mandate to states and courts. The video is linked in the previous sentence. To comment on this legislation and story, please use the Contact form here.

My Advocate Center supports Georgia Courts in improving child safety and mental health.

Why did My Advocate Center begin publishing information about this proposed resolution back in April of 2018?  The answer: child safety and emotional well-being should always be the first priority of every legal matter involving children. Always. Most of us, however, could not fathom that this has NOT been the case; in fact, the true needs of children, including protection from an abusive parent, are often ignored.

You’ve seen the news reports, heard the stories and talked about it on social media, or maybe only quietly shared it with your counselor when privately grieving what has happened to you or to your loved ones.

The next step for Georgians is to ask our policy leaders to help create momentum on this issue. Please sign the petition below and get to know your U.S. Representatives by sharing your experience with them.

What is the overall goal?

Keeping our children safe, our families stable and healthy, protecting our rights as parents and grandparents to care for our own children. To do this, we need to improve how our courts and legal professionals manage family disputes that enter the the legal system.

Did you know? We reached over 1000 signatures on our previous petition, so just imagine what we can do now!

Filed Under: Be Your Own Best Advocate, Child Abuse Response & Prevention, Child Custody, Civil Rights Deprivation, Court Watch, Evolving Solutions: Family Law, Judicial Guide to Child Custody, On Behalf of Children, Parenting through conflict, Parents Rights, Preventing Tragedy & Loss, Professional Misconduct, Protection for Georgia Citizens, Reform Makes Business Sense, Solutions-Based Journalism, US Legislation on Child Custody Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Ready, Aim, Fire at Pain and Anguish

April 10, 2018 by

Following the grief over the loss of life in school shootings, I started researching and realized that others were doing the same thing, trying to find the root cause for the extreme rage and motivation to harm others. I knew from a couple of situations that what happens to children during escalated and prolonged family conflict had something to do with these rampages.

A few insights shared on Mic.com:

“A parent’s death or divorce also appears to be a commonality among some of the lone shooters — Adam Lanza (Newtown, 2012), Elliot Rodgers (Santa Barbara, 2014) and Nikolas Cruz (Parkland 2018). Research indicates boys appear to be more at risk than girls when their parents divorce, particularly when it comes to higher suicide rates.

“It’s one brick or thread that could set a child up to have more a vulnerability if someone doesn’t step in and raise a child, teaching them to respect the rights of others and that actions have consequences,” said Richard Warshak, a clinical psychologist at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center, and author of Divorce Poison, which explores acrimonious divorce and the psychological effects on children of parental bad-mouthing.

“Divorce sets in motion a set of changes that put kids at risk for problems in behavior.”

Divorce is not “inherently bad” for every child, he says. But there are risks, especially if it changes the family’s financial situation or parents “bad-mouth” each other.

Several studies over three decades show that divorce — especially an acrimonious one — can increase a child’s risk for developing depression, anxiety and engaging in criminal acts.”

These issues aren’t things we discuss often enough, but we should.

I wish I didn’t have a personal experience to validate these findings, but I do. I witnessed it in my own step-sons, when I was too young and without the authority to help them overcome what had happened to them and their mother. And, I didn’t have the right information at the time. I just knew they were suffering, and it seemed like there had to be a way to help them through it. I wish I could have done more to help them avoid failures in those early years, and the loss of one’s life later on.

No, I can’t go back in time, but I can engage leadership, stakeholders and problem-solves across society to do more with what we know now.

Filed Under: Alienation of Affection, Bullying of Children, Child Abuse Response & Prevention, Child Custody, Domestic Violence, Family Violence, Judicial Guide to Child Custody, Kids Need Their Parents, On Behalf of Children, Parenting through conflict, US Legislation on Child Custody, Where Are My Parents? Tagged With: ,

Protected: Children Traded as Commodities

September 2, 2017 by

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Filed Under: Addressing Bad Practices: False Allegations, Assault Victims, Billing Issues, Case Studies & Examples, Child Abuse Response & Prevention, Child Custody, Child Custody Evaluators, Child Support, Children as Pawns, Civil Rights Deprivation, Court Watch, Due Process Denial, Evolving Solutions: Family Law, False Allegations, Family Violence, Financial Matters, First Amendment Rights, GAL Misconduct, Guardian Ad Litem, Justice, Kids Need Their Parents, Legal & Medical Malpractice, National Media on Child Custody, Newnan News, News Media Covering Family Court, On Behalf of Children, Parents Rights, Preventing Tragedy & Loss, Private Investigators, Professional Misconduct, Protection for Georgia Citizens, Psychology Today, Reform Makes Business Sense, Rights of Children, Social Media Impact, Transcripts Altered or Incomplete, US Legislation on Child Custody, Witness Tampering, Wrongful Imprisonment Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Judicial Guide to Child Safety in Custody

August 19, 2017 by

Having visited many courtrooms around the state of Georgia over the last decade, for extended hours observing and studying in clerk’s offices, I can say there is a marked difference between judges who have an eye and ear for filtering out abusive and deceptive tactics, and those who don’t.

This Guide was developed by the NCJFCJ for judges and other officers of the court to use for the specific purpose of enhancing child safety.

Coercive control is one of the key terms identifying the methods used by a parent who is willing to use children to harm the other parent and/or for financial gain. Being a compelling liar often goes hand-in-hand with the ability to effectively coerce a child or parent into complying with demands. Another sign that coercive control is being used is that the controlling parent and counsel are indifferent to the trauma caused to the children and the targeted or victimized parent.

Please download and share the Guide below, and contact the NCJFCJ with questions, and let me know if local case studies might be helpful for your staff. This Guide and the related Trauma-Response documents are equally important for law enforcement, child protective services and all first responders, especially pediatricians and emergency room staff and doctors.

What has largely been missing from those responding to the outcries for help made by parents and children caught in conflict is an understanding of exactly how harmful litigation is for victims of abuse and their children, and what it means when protection is denied.

For this reason, I’ve also included a compelling read on this facet of child safety.

For Abuse Survivors, Custody Remains a Tool for Perpetrators to Retain Control – Pacific Standard by Deb Beacham on Scribd

 

Judicial Guide to Child Safety in Custody Cases by Deb Beacham on Scribd

Filed Under: Alienation of Affection, Alienation of Parents & Children, Assault Victims, Child Abuse Response & Prevention, Child Custody, Domestic Violence, Early Prevention, Evolving Solutions: Family Law, Free Jack and Thomas, Guardian Ad Litem, Kids Need Their Parents, On Behalf of Children, US Legislation on Child Custody Tagged With: , , , , ,

Preparing Your Court for a Trauma Consult

August 19, 2017 by

Being trauma-informed means asking,

What happened to you and how can we help?

versus

What is wrong with you?

The Trauma Manual for Judges in Family and Juvenile Courts

Informed judicial officers and other court professionals can make an immediate, positive impact on children and parents who are being traumatized by abuse and fraud within their immediate family or through their extended family units.

This applies to schools, churches and to healthcare companies and organizations as well. The kind of stress and trauma that is inflicted in litigation, especially where custody disputes are used as weapons against a victim of domestic abuse or fraud, for example. Any first responder, mandated reporter of abuse or anyone interacting with families and children in a professional capacity should become trauma-informed.

We believe it’s worth spending the extra time learning and discussing these issues with court officials, professionals in other fields, and also with family members in your cases to engage them in the process.

This guide or Trauma Manual as referred to by the National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges will go a long way toward making your courtroom a safer and more constructive path for those who enter your court seeking protection and relief from abuse. [Read the Judicial Guide to Child Safety in Custody Cases to learn to recognize signs that abuse may be concealed from the record.]

NCJFCJ Trauma Manual for Family and Juvenile Court Judges by Deb Beacham on Scribd

Filed Under: Alienation of Parents & Children, Assault Victims, Child Abuse Response & Prevention, Child Custody, Early Prevention, Free Jack and Thomas, Guardian Ad Litem, Judicial Guide to Child Custody, On Behalf of Children, Preventing Tragedy & Loss, Professional Spotlight, Psychological Professionals, Rights of Children, US Legislation on Child Custody Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Child Safety Must Come First by US Representatives

July 29, 2017 by

Great news for children and parents being denied protection from domestic abuse, who are often harmed during prolonged child custody litigation.

Please read, share and contact your state’s leaders to join in with their support of this House Resolution No. 72.

Georgia’s children and parents are especially vulnerable, as hundreds of cases across the state now prove. Television and print news media and several independent journalists have documented professional conduct in what is referred to as “sensitive” cases, including by filing Rule 22 Requests to Record judicial proceedings.

The big deal about the conduct being documented is this: the way many Georgia child custody cases are managed often puts children in harm’s way as they are given to the parent most likely to cause stress or injury.  It is hard to fathom if you can not see it firsthand, but sometimes court professionals, including child custody experts, go so far as to deny children and adult victims of domestic abuse protection and even necessary medical and psychological care.

If you live in Georgia, you can find your U.S. Representatives here. Please encourage your representatives to read and support this resolution. And, in Georgia, learn how you can encourage leadership to keep our courts and court records open and accessible.

As these cases are usually cloaked by a veil of secrecy, and speaking about what is happening to the family is frowned upon and outright discouraged, it is critical that journalists are not restricted in recording judicial proceedings or in obtaining case records.

Both of these issues, policy to improve child safety and rules governing the ability to record judicial proceedings, need your attention.

Thank you!

Child Safety and Child Custody in House Resolution 72 / Bipartisan Support by Deb Beacham on Scribd

Filed Under: Alienation of Affection, Assault Victims, Case Studies & Examples, Child Abuse Response & Prevention, Child Custody, Child Custody Evaluators, Child Sexual Abuse, Children as Pawns, Domestic Violence, Due Process Denial, Early Prevention, Evolving Solutions: Family Law, Family Court Reform, Family Court Review, Family Violence, Guardian Ad Litem, Judicial Guide to Child Custody, Judicial Qualifications Commission, Kids Need Their Parents, National Media on Child Custody, Preventing Tragedy & Loss, Psychological Professionals, Rights of Children, US Legislation on Child Custody Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,